I Am A Fat Woman And So What?

Fuck you one more time, because at some point in my life I listened to you and I almost went insane with hunger and misery. I became deficient in so many macro and micro nutrients, I was anemic and developed ulcers. I could hardly sleep, I was sad and frustrated all the time. And yet I forced myself to eat tiny servings of food, less than a quarter of what my body needed to function. I suffered because I listened and heard you!

All those snarky comments and disrespectful names you call me. I heard them still hear them, I let them dictate my life, and I almost died. The names, the names, the names:

Obolo

Obiggie

Bontough

Fatso

Okesie

FatiBomBom

Tantalabuteele

Woman with enough body.

I’ve heard them all. And they are all disrespectful. If you want to know my name, ask, I will tell you. If I looked at a slim person and called them Chopsticks, I doubt anyone would expect them to accept it as normal. But you expect me to respond to your disrespect with docile compliance, why? I am a fat woman so you believe you’re entitled to label me?

I hear the backhanded compliments and veiled insults. “It’s such a surprise how confident you are, where do you get your confidence from?”

Where do I get my confidence from? Would you ask Miss Vee that question, or Becca, or Yvonne Nelson. What about Rihanna or Beyonce? Where do I get my confidence from? I get it from deep within my very essence, in the fabric of my being, in the extra sauce God sprinkled on me. I am unapologetically me. I will always, always, always, show up and show out!! I am a fat woman and so fucking what?

And my favorite veiled insult, “You are fat but you have a pretty face.”

Bitch I am pretty. Period!

And Oh, let me not try to eat. God forbid I put food in my own mouth! My size has become a conscious factor of my daily life, I do not need you to remind me. I know, I am very much aware of the reasons I need to watch my lifestyle. I am at high risk of everything, I know thank you very much.

Now let me tell you something, I am a fat woman, a big girl with a big brain. My big brain needs fuel, so I will eat. And my big brain lends itself to intelligence. I have a good job, I make good money. I earn enough to live healthy, eat healthy, and play healthy. And by the way, I get immaculate dick! The fine, rich, well built and well toned men you want, those are the ones I get.

My physical makeup will always demand I stay on top of my health. And I do. I work out religiously, I watch my diet, and I stay on top of my vital stats. But I am never, ever going to chase weight loss to appease you and your ignorant opinions.

So may I ask, while you’re busy beating down on me and trying to cut me down to size,literally and figuratively, have you taken time to check your cholesterol levels? How are you doing?

I am a fat woman, and so what?

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