They say birds of a feather flock together. And they say the apple does not fall far from the tree. Let me not forget like mother, like daughter. But are these always true? Do birds of a feather always flock together? I need help.
I have been dating this girl for a year now. She is a nurse. It is a long distance relationship, but has been well. My girlfriend has one sibling from her mother’s side. That is to say my mother-in-law to be has one other child apart from my girlfriend; a son.
My girl’s father died early, so the mum married another man with ‘whom’ she had the second child.
Why I put ‘whom’ in parentheses, is the motive for this write up. The second child, who is my girlfriend’s brother, is not the step dad’s son. But step dad thinks he is the biological father of the boy.
The mom got pregnant by another man, and for reasons best known to her, she decided to give the pregnancy to her present husband.
How I got to know, my girlfriend told me. According to her, she chanced on an argument between her mother and the true father of her brother. The biological father gave the mom an ultimatum, divorce her husband or be exposed as to who the real father of her child is.
I think when my girl discovered the truth, she was in shock. For days, she was in tears every time I saw her. So she finally confided in me.
Truth be told, this discovery is making me look at my girl in a different type of way these days. I am beginning to love interest, or should I say I already lost interest? I feel she can do the same to me.
One thing that shocks me most is the way the mom is so loving towards her husband. She supported him financially in footing the cost of their wedding. If she didn’t pay full cost for that wedding, I dare say she paid 90% of the cost. It is so nice to see them together, the display of affection is so nice to see. And yet when no one is looking, this is the evil she does to him.
Can my girlfriend do the same to me? Are mother and daughter birds of a feather?
She has been good so far . My only issue with her is how insecure she can be.
Advice me. I love her but forever is too long to get it wrong.
MissKorang says:
Do birds of a feather really always flock together?
First off, your girl made a terrible blunder. That secret was not hers to tell. She shouldn’t have told you or anyone else for that matter. But she told you so let’s move on.
When your girlfriend confided in you, I think it was in total confidence. She felt safe to talk to you. I doubt she gave any thought about how you would feel about her when she told you this atomic bomb of a secret. To this end, I feel sorry for her, it almost feels like a betrayal.
But on the other hand, please know I perfectly understand you. Like you aid, forever is too long to get it wrong.
Let me put things in perspective for you with two differing examples of how parental behavior and lifestyles influence offspring.
I once dated a guy briefly while I was in University. In the course of the relationship, I found out he had two children with two women. I confronted him, and his response was, “My father had many children with many women, but in the end he settled with the woman he loved and wanted to be with. Don’t let this bother you.”
And he said it so casually, and with such nonchalance, I knew he saw absolutely nothing wrong with that lifestyle. His father did it, he was doing it, it was normal to him. Birds of a feather!
Of course I left him, I am not one with a lot of space in my life for foolishness. As I write this today, he has five children with three women.
And I have a friend. A dear, dear friend of mine. His father was an alcoholic, the joke of their little town. The man just had to have alcohol to live. If he could help it, he never had a sober moment. He was no kind of father to my friend and his siblings, neither was he any kind of husband to their mother. The family suffered a great deal due to the man’s addiction. But mom stood and did her best for her children, so all four siblings are well educated and in great places right now. And guess what? Due to the destruction he witnessed alcohol do to his father, my friend does not drink or go near alcohol. He saw what alcohol did to his father, and he advised himself.
I say all that to say this, the apple may not fall far from the tree, or the apple just might. Like mother, like daughter isn’t always true, but sometimes it is. Birds of a feather may flock together, but sometimes a couple get left behind.
Concluding that she will cheat and bring you an illegitimate child just because she is her mother’s daughter isn’t fair to her in my opinion. If she supported her mom, she wouldn’t have been in distress about this secret. Apart from the day she confided in you, have you guys had any conversation about it at all? Is she proud of it, is she disgusted? Talk to her, see where her heart is, before you jump to hasty conclusions.
Don’t lose a good woman to fear.
Wish you all the best.
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At MissKorang we strive to bring you life stories that teach timeless life lessons and, some of those stories, like this one, are real life stories submitted by our readers and shared with their permission. Identifying attributes are edited out to protect our contributors’ privacy.Can you leave your thoughts with these kind people in the comments? If you want to send us your experience, email us at submissions@misskorang.com. Or submit using this anonymous form. Please do not reproduce any part of this content without permission from us. Our stories contain affiliate links. When you click and make a purchase, we may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.
At MissKorang we strive to bring you life stories that teach timeless life lessons and, some of those stories, like this one, are real life stories submitted by our readers and shared with their permission. Identifying attributes are edited out to protect our contributors’ privacy.Can you leave your thoughts with these kind people in the comments? If you want to send us your experience, email us at submissions@misskorang.com. Or submit using this anonymous form. Please do not reproduce any part of this content without permission from us. Our stories contain affiliate links. When you click and make a purchase, we may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.
